Don’t be a sissy.

Back in 2004, I was sitting at the small kitchen table in Mom’s retirement apartment when she put a cookie in front of me, along with a cup of Sanka coffee. “Here,” she said. “Have a napkin, too.”

She handed me a luncheon-size napkin with a cartoon and a pithy saying on it. Two old ladies were sitting together on a park bench, and one was saying to the other, “Old age isn’t for sissies.”

Old Age

I chuckled and said, “Cute, Mom. Where’d you get these?”

“I bought ‘em myself, because that’s how it is.” She was 91 at the time and I was 58 – clearly a generation gap.

Now that I’m a dozen years closer to 91, I’m starting to appreciate Mom’s napkin philosophy. Some might say youth is wasted on the young, but the truth is, only the elderly have gained the courage and stamina to deal with old age.

IMG_5759Growing old gracefully is full of daunting challenges. Nothing but a lifetime in the School of Hard Knocks can prepare us to cope with the surprises that come as the years pile up.

The same is true in our Christian lives. God compares spiritual youth to physical babyhood. A diet of biblical milk is all we can digest, and anything else would be like trying to feed steak to a newborn.

Much later, as we accumulate more years of walking with God, we develop some spiritual teeth and begin tentatively sinking them into the harder parts of life. We learn to swallow small bits of biblical meat and receive nourishment enough to weather hardship.

Whether it’s physical or spiritual maturity, it takes time and experience to do life well. And when we’ve passed threescore and ten, living through the years after that requires spiritual muscle that can only come by eating the right diet… with or without a philosophical napkin.

“Do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature.” (1 Corinthians 14:20)

You never know…

Baby MomMom was born in 1912. Arriving several weeks prematurely, she was the fourth baby in her family. Because she was tiny, the doctor told her parents, “Don’t give her a name. She’s not going to make it, so you don’t want to get too attached.”

But Mom fooled everybody; she lived to be 92. You just never know…

Nelson at 9 monthsOur firstborn nearly died at nine months with a case of croup we thought was just laryngitis. When he couldn’t sleep for all the coughing, we called the doctor, who sent us to the hospital. En route, the baby went limp, his eyes rolled back, and we were terrified.

Thanks to quick, discerning doctors, he lived, and after four days in the hospital, he slowly recuperated. When it was all over, Nate and I fell apart, realizing how close we’d come to losing our little guy. You just never know…

Fast forward to 2009, when Nate and I relocated to Michigan. His plan had been to continue full time lawyering for two more years, then gradually scale back. But “untimely” cancer arrived, and 42 days later, our plans were shelved. Nate died “ahead of schedule” at 64. We hadn’t planned on that, but you just never know…

Celebrating lifeLast February my sister Mary learned that after 70 healthy years, she, too, was slated to tangle with cancer. Since then it’s been 1 major surgery, a couple of minor ones, and 3 months of chemo. We’re all hoping she’ll live to be an old lady, and so far so good. But as she says, you never know…

None of us ever knows. The biblical Methuselah lived to be 969 years old, but King David’s baby died as a newborn.  When we were born, God didn’t promise old age, yet we find ourselves angry when someone is taken “before their time.” If they’ve died, though, it was their time. We can’t know ahead, because God doesn’t tell.

???????????????????????????????The Bible describes long life as a blessing, and everyone seems to want it. Mom was thankful for her long life and lived each day vigorously, but in her last years she often said, “Old age isn’t for sissies.” Troubles of all kinds pile high on the elderly, weighing them down with woe, and she was no exception. In order for anyone to handle those burdensome days, great stores of wisdom and godliness are a prerequisite. So when we wish for longevity, we’re signing up for the toughest challenge of our lives.

You just never know…    But then maybe it’s better that way.

”No man has power over the wind to contain it; so no one has power over the day of his death.” (Ecclesiastes 8:8)

Praising and Praying with Mary

  1. I’m thankful nausea continues to be mild.
  2. And my new feeding tube, a different system than the old one, feels much better. PTL!