Good Advice

If I were you, I’d…
I think you should…
You ought to…
You’d better consider…

Some people are always offering advice, whether solicited or not.

A while ago, a long-time friend sent me two letters written by Nate. He’d mailed them to her and her husband in 1986, and she knew I’d appreciate “hearing from Nate” now. These friends of ours were going through a financial squeeze much like we were at the time, and Nate had been touched by their plight.

Two letters from NateThe first letter’s purpose was to encourage them. He quotes Winston Churchill’s statement, “Never, never, never, never give in!” and refers to Roosevelt’s speech about trying valiantly rather than giving up without a fight. Nate wrote, “Tough as it is, it’s much better to have tried and failed than never to have tried at all.”

In four handwritten pages, he gives only two short sentences of advice: 1) Keep your attitude up, and 2) call me if you want some free lawyer advice on your lawsuit.

It warmed me to see Nate’s large, loopy handwriting again, although I used to fuss at him for not writing more legibly. But better than the penmanship was his message. I remember those dark, worrisome days well. Nate was not only frustrated with his career plunge but felt like a personal failure to his family, which included 6 children at the time. Yet somehow he came up with 4 pages of uplifting words for our friends.

None of us can say why life has to include massive failures and disappointments. Maybe it has to do with our asking God to make us more like Christ. That never comes without suffering or pain, and hardship gives us that chance. Of course we can become angry about it, but that’s hardly fair if we’ve asked for Christ-likeness.

Trials push us to Scripture and prayer, which brings us closer to God. Coming closer to God results in rubbing shoulders with Jesus, which in turn makes us more like him. What begins as harmful can turn out well.

In Nate’s second letter, he relates the details of his own struggle. I sense that writing it out long hand somehow helped him. Our financial future was spinning like a tornado, and summarizing it on paper seemed to bring calm into his personal storm.

He ends with an invitation for these friends (who lived one state away) to come and visit us, writing out exact driving directions to our house. Although this couple now lives four states away, we are still “close”…

…close enough for them to know how much I would love receiving two letters from Nate.

“You are a letter from Christ… This “letter” is written not with pen and ink, but with the Spirit of the living God. It is carved not on tablets of stone, but on human hearts.” (2 Corinthians 3:3)

Come and get me.

Any of us who’ve lost loved ones to death find our thoughts moving between two different worlds, the here and the hereafter. This back-and-forth thought process includes a pause at a theological stop sign: Christ’s second coming.

According to the calendar of human history, we’re living in that middle ground between Jesus’ first coming and his second, his first as a newborn who grew into our radical Savior, and his second as a Victor in battle.

Once in a while I think, “What if Jesus returned tonight?”

The Second ComingHe promised that when he did come back, it would be to defeat evil and escort Christians to heaven. He actually said, “I’ll take you home with me.” (John 14:2)

I love that he’s implying we’ll feel at home when we get to heaven. It’ll be similar to returning home after an arduous journey with a big “ahhh” of contentment. But I’m not really sure I want it to be tonight, and there’s a good reason: I need more time to do better at the Christian life.

Most of us get only 7 or 8 decades on the earth, and it took me about half of those to get into gear in my walk with the Lord. Much of my early life was bare-minimum believing as I straddled a spiritual fence between obedience and rebellion. Even now in my late 60′s, I should be doing much better.

So, I figure, I need more time to keep trying.

Is Jesus reading this and chuckling? Or is he reading it and saying, “You’ve got the right idea.” Being unsure of the answer is an indication of my spiritual immaturity. Of course I’m longing to be with Jesus and walk into his home, discovering the place he’s prepared for me. But as the Bible so aptly puts it,”Night is coming, when no one can work.” (John 4:9) Time to try harder will eventually end.

My hesitation to head to heaven isn’t because I want to earn more glory-points. It’s about feeling bad over personal sin and hoping to become a better daughter to my heavenly Father. There’s just one nagging thought behind my philosophy of wanting more earthly time. What if my condition as a human being is exactly the factor that’s prohibiting greater success at godly living? What if even the most saintly person among us feels just like I do, no matter how many years she’s had to work on it?

In that case, it would be a really good thing if Jesus just came and got us tonight.

“To the one who does not work but trusts God, who justifies the ungodly, their faith is credited as righteousness.” (Romans 4:5)

I promise!

When the local toll roads were built in the 1950’s, their promise was that all toll booths would be removed after the highway was paid for, 3 years. Fifty-three years later, we’re still paying.

coin toss tollingIn the early days of driving the toll road, we received a card when we got on and then turned it in when we got off. Our toll was calculated from the card. Eventually that system was replaced with cash-as-you-go, starting at 25 cents per toll. We stopped every 30 miles or so to throw change into a plastic bin.

Now we have “open road tolling,” which means the toll road can take our money without us stopping to give it to them. When Nate and I used to drive the toll road between Illinois and Michigan, he’d often complain about the highway authority going back on its word to upgrade the road into a freeway. Quite a few people felt that way, expressing their opinions in law suits and citizen groups established to put pressure on the powers-that-be. But today we’re still paying.

Keeping our word is important. It’s a character quality seen less and less these days and runs rampant in the political world with unmet campaign promises. But the most important place to keep our word is in one-on-one relationships such as husband-and-wife, parent-and-child, friend-and-friend. If I was given the chance to do one thing differently in my past, it would be to keep my word better.

If I told Nate, “I’ll pick you up at the train at 6:35,” I wish I had always been there waiting for him rather than him waiting for me. If I told the kids, “Don’t do that again or you’ll get a spanking,” I wish I had always followed through.

It’s especially important to keep our word when we tell someone we won’t share a confidence with anyone else. If we violate that, our word becomes worthless, not to mention the damage we do to that person and our relationship with him or her.

I’ve asked myself, “What would the Christian life be like if God didn’t keep his word?” He’s told us that he does everything he says he’ll do, and Scripture backs that up. He’s kept his promises in my own life, and I’ve seen him do it in others’. Because I’ve experienced failure at always keeping my word, I’m doubly appreciative that I can count on him to keep his. After all, his has eternal consequences.

Open road tollingDriving the toll roads is a helpful reminder that I want to be trusted to keep my word. And maybe in the long run, the toll road will make good on its promise, too. The latest word is that it’ll be paid for in 2034. If I still have a driver’s license at 89, you’ll find me driving the freeway.

“Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” (Psalm 141:3)

Praising and Praying with Mary

Praise God that tomorrow is my last chemo infusion! Please pray they find a good vein. And on side note, my 10th grandchild is due any day in Michigan. A big praise for new beginnings!