Yearly Archives: 2013

A Beach Party Lesson

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Many people say the Bible is hard to read. It’s a big book for sure; my copy has 2067 pages. But a good place to start is with the Gospels: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. They read like storybooks about Jesus, detailing the things he said and did.

One of my favorite Bible stories is told in John, and maybe the reason I like it so much is because it describes a beach party. Jesus hosts it for some of his disciples, and since the anguish of the cross is over, these men now know him as their risen Savior.

But things between them have changed. Where formerly they’d literally hung out with Jesus night and day, since the resurrection they’d only seen him twice, and then only briefly. No doubt they had questions. “Is Jesus out of the picture now? What does that mean for us? Should we go back to our old professions?”

Fishing boat

In the biblical beach story, Peter seems to be moving in that direction. “I’m going fishing,” he says. “Do any of you want to come?”

Some did, and surely as they bobbed along on the Sea of Galilee that night, they conversed about the radical changes for all of them since Jesus’ death and resurrection. Their understanding of what was going to happen next, either to Jesus or themselves, was minimal.

Talking on the boat, most likely they expressed a longing to be with Jesus “full time” as they had been such a short time before. By dawn, exhausted, hungry, and discouraged, the fishermen head for shore. Across the water about a length of a football field away, they spot a man on the beach who shouts to them, questioning them about their catch (or rather the lack thereof).

Jesus calls to the disciples

When their net miraculously fills with big fish, they recognize the man as Jesus and are thrilled! Even so, John writes, “None of them dared ask him, ‘Who are you?’ ” Their relationships with Jesus had somehow changed, and most likely this was painful for each of them.

My guess is they’d been missing Jesus so much that they literally ached to be with him. In many ways, I understand what they were going through, but not in relation to missing Jesus. My missing has been all about Nate.

When I thought about the disciples and especially the demonstrative Peter, who leapt into the water and swam toward Jesus the instant he recognized him, my heart jabbed me. “If only I could have that kind of one-more-meeting with my husband. Just one breakfast like the disciples got with the person they’d been longing for.” But the impossibility of that made Nate’s absence seem worse.

As I studied the beach Bible story, I sensed God was about to teach me something new. And it turned out to be something pretty important.

(Continued tomorrow…)

Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish you have just caught…. Come and have breakfast.” (John 21:10,12)

Life – Ongoing

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One thing about us widows is that we stick together, and the question all new widows ask each other is, “How long before I feel better?”

Meanwhile, life keeps happening, and a widow’s first hurdle is to accept the shock that when her husband died, the rest of the world kept going. Such a discovery makes her feel isolated, but the fact that life goes on can also be a motivator, preventing her from believing that there’s nothing more to live for.

Prints from Nicholas

One month before my husband Nate and I heard the words “pancreatic cancer,” we had our annual double-birthday party. By then we were grandparents to 18 month old Skylar and 7 month old Nicholas. Since both lived far from our Michigan home (Florida and England), it was wonderful to receive birthday greetings and photographs from both that year.

Prints from Nicholas.

Nicholas’ parents had made ceramic mugs for Nate and I with his baby handprints and footprints on them. This grandchild is 4 years old now, and when he was last here at Christmas time, I showed him the mugs. He matched his much larger hand to his baby handprint and enjoyed seeing how much he’d grown.

As I continue to use those two mugs, I can’t help but think how much has happened since Nate left us. And of course there’s more “happenings” to come. Klaus reminded me today that his fiancée Brooke never met her future father-in-law, since she came into Klaus’ life a few weeks after Nate died.

Klaus and Brooke.

But what he said immediately after that warmed me. “After all I’ve told her about Papa, she feels like she knows him.” Because Nate was important to Klaus, he frequently and freely talks about him. And because he’s been important to Klaus, he’s becoming important to Brooke.

Our loved ones may die, but as life moves away from their death dates, the influence they’ve had on other people hasn’t died. Sometimes it’s even expanded.

I love talking about Nate and the experiences I’ve had with him, and as I thought about this, I asked myself if I do as well talking about Jesus and the experiences I’ve had with him. Are the people around me, especially those who haven’t met him personally, coming to know him through my steady references to him? Do they “feel like they know him” as Brooke feels about Nate?

Life is moving forward. Birthdays are accumulating. Small hands and feet are growing bigger. Some people are dying while others are being born. But Jesus stays the same through every change and has promised to stick with widows (and anyone else who so desires) as they go through them. He’s just hoping those of us who already know him will faithfully make him known.

The Apostle Paul said, “I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me — the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.” (Acts 20:24)

Sum…. Sum…. Summertime

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For those of us who love hot, sunny weather, summertime is where it’s at. Once May 1st arrives, we’re giddy with anticipation, and if perchance May presents us with an 80 degree day, it’s cause for audible hallelujahs.

Perfect beach day

Today was that day! The windows flew open despite the absence of screens, the hot-weather clothes emerged from the back of the closet, and my bike rolled up from its basement storage. Along with my still-packed beach bag from last summer, today’s beach outing was delightfully July-like. And to celebrate, Jack got started on his annual shedding program.

There’s something cathartic about settling into a beach chair and notching it to tip-back position. The sigh of “ahhhhh” explains the feeling…. or maybe that’s just for us summertime people. For us, any excuse is good enough to head for a sunny beach, and I’d pitch a permanent tent on the sand if I could. But there is a down side.

Ahhhhh

My skin testifies to how many thousands of hours I’ve spent beneath powerful sun rays at the shore, and the fact that I have my own skin doctor is proof of damage done, amidst the many hallelujahs and ahhhhhs.

Most of us (not just us summer-timers) are experts at justifying the things we love to do, even if it might have harmful consequences for ourselves or, worse yet, for someone else. (I’m not referring to anything illegal here.) We can list all kinds of reasons why it’s ok, even profitable, to spend time doing what might be beneficial in small doses, in big ones. Sometimes we rationalize it to the point of believing we’d be foolish not to do it, and once that happens, it’s difficult to set a limit.

That is, unless God sets it for us.

He might challenge us to take another look at how we’re spending our time through the words of someone we respect and admire, or he could confront us through the mouth of a child we love. It’s possible he’ll stop us by orchestrating consequences that require medical attention, even allowing us to experience an accident. Maybe he’ll simply demonstrate how the losses outweigh the benefits of whatever we’re doing too much of.

Whatever technique God uses, it will or won’t work depending on how we respond.

Some of us plow ahead with doing what we like to do, thinking we’re demonstrating the positive qualities of strength and determination. In reality, being unable to limit ourselves is probably a sign of weakness. But God’s intentions are to strengthen us to do what’s right.

SPF 15

And so, rather than sit under a cloudless sky in a tipped-back beach chair for too many skin-damaging hours, I decided to take action.

I upped the SPF number on my sun screen.

”You’re fortunate if your behavior and your belief are coherent. But if you’re not sure, if you notice that you are acting in ways inconsistent with what you believe…. then you know that you’re out of line.” (Romans 14:22-23, The Message)