Monthly Archives: December 2012

Loving commitment

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Last night we enjoyed a simple supper of homemade turkey noodle soup and fresh bread at a table surrounded by both old and young engaging in animated conversation. Toward the end of the meal Klaus casually said, “Brooke and I went shopping for antiques today…. and we got engaged.”

He said it so matter-of-factly, we all froze, waiting for a punch line. But then we looked at the smiling Brooke, who slowly raised her left hand to reveal a sparkling diamond ring. Klaus wasn’t kidding!

Everyone broke into applause, jumping from their chairs and scrambling over each other to deliver congratulations and hugs. Grandchildren Nicholas, Evelyn, and Thomas were stunned at our crazy behavior, wondering how the focus so rapidly had shifted from dessert to a ring.

But we wanted the juicy details. Klaus had enlisted the help of several friends to pull off his surprise, “planting” them and his ring at an antique store ahead of time. Store employees were in on it too, willingly nestling the diamond ring among others inside a glass case. Brooke had been looking for a casual ring of turquoise, so the two of them were browsing through the jewelry. When Klaus nonchalantly pointed out the diamond ring and said, “How ‘bout that one?” Brooke was puzzled.

But when he dropped to one knee, her bewilderment changed to joy, and the clerks broke into tears. As planned, Klaus’ friends caught everything on film, a successful surprise with a lovely ending.

Or I should say “beginning.”

Anyone who’s experienced a proposal can vividly recall that moment. How a man handles this important event makes a mark on the relationship that will last throughout the marriage, not just in the woman’s mind, but in his, too.

By giving an engagement ring, a man is pledging to put that one woman above all others, which is the official beginning of an exclusive, lifelong bond marked by a special ring. He is promising her, and she is believing him. And since marriage was God’s idea, he’s involved in that moment, too, holding up a banner                                                                     that reads, “Loving commitment.”

When a man proposes, he’s lovingly committing to his fiancee’, which greatly pleases the Lord. But yesterday God wasn’t just standing by passively at the antique store. He was making a commitment, too, to be as involved in their relationship as they ask him to be.

He has said that earthly marriage is a visual for the relationship between Jesus and the Church worldwide, which is us. So, as Klaus honors God by staying faithful to the loving commitment he made yesterday to Brooke, and as Brooke responds to him with respect, their marriage will thrive and God will be blessed. Bumps in the road will be made smooth, and they’ll make it to their 50th wedding anniversary hand-in-hand.

As for the rest of us, we are thrilled to welcome vivacious Brooke into the Nyman family and are eagerly looking forward to celebrating with them at their spring wedding!

 “Let no one split apart what God has joined together.” (Mark 10:9)

Happy Holiday!

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The holidays offer great times to get extended family members together, and most families try to do it. We’re no different, and the first grouping has just arrived. Hans and Katy, who live in north England, flew across the Atlantic yesterday and ended their long, tiring journey at my house, about dinnertime.

The little ones, ages 3, 2, and 2, hopped out of the van and came bolting toward me in a little pack of enthusiasm, arms spread wide, yelling, “MeeMee! MeeMee!” It was a greeting of love I won’t soon forget! Despite battling jet lag, they held up beautifully through the evening, and when they saw the welcome-cake Louisa had baked, their eyes opened wide! (In a phone call from Britain several days before, I’d asked them what kind of cake they each liked best. Their preferences, green, pink and black, were all baked inside.)

Equally exciting, though, was meeting their new little cousin, Emerald. By the end of the day her little head had been covered with heartfelt kisses and cuddles, and I learned that 2 year old Evelyn has a baby growing in her tummy, too. The fact that she has a new brother or sister growing inside her mommy’s tummy might have had something to do with her announcement.

Next week our census will increase as Linnea’s family of 5 arrives, along with Nelson who will be coming home from Armenia via commitments in Denver, Montana, and Kona. Also on hand will be Lars and Louisa from Chicago, and of course Klaus, based near me year-round. And that’s all of us.

Expectations are running high that events will unfold smoothly, favorite traditions will be kept, good health will hold, and happiness will reign. What family doesn’t hope for all that at the holidays? We picture a Thomas Kincaid painting with fluffy snow on the ground, children playing without bickering, and everyone thrilled with their Christmas gifts.

It’s when this kind of optimism is soaring that we have to be most careful. I don’t think any family hasn’t experienced holiday disappointment during one celebration or another. Maybe it’s distressing conversations or friction during mealtimes, and they’ve become as much a holiday tradition as Christmas brunch. None of us want that, but gathering flawed people together with hopes for a perfect occasion is hardly logical.

So what can be done?

  1. I can work to model an example of cheerfulness, regardless of what others do.
  2. I can commit each holiday get-together to God’s care, beforehand.
  3. I can diffuse stress by interjecting praise and gratitude.

And if all that fails, I can simply dish up the cake!

“Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

A Unique Teaching Method

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Christmas is 20 days away, coaxing us to think again about the baby of Bethlehem. How did the Trinity decide together on such an outlandish scheme to bring salvation to mankind? Divinity reduced to a newborn? And even more incredible, reduced to a single cell within the human body of a regular woman?

But that became the plan for one important reason: Jesus wanted to do everything we did, to be tempted like us, struggle like us, feel like us, and live with our limitations. Amazingly, he wanted to be just like us.

But why?

One reason was to teach us what a well-lived human life should look like. Another, and of course the most important reason, was to save our souls, a rationale we still can’t understand but enormously appreciate.

I love thinking about Jesus as an infant, then a toddler and a little child. Surely he had an ordinary childhood relationship with his mother, and she did for him all the things we moms did/do for our children. Then as he grew, he lived a model life in front of relatives, friends, and neighbors. Through Scripture’s pages, he became our model, too.

But when did his teaching begin? Was it at age 30 at the start of his ministry? Or well before that? Is it possible his choice to become a born-baby was meant to teach us something, too?

My mom loved kids, preferring their company to that of adults. I think one of the reasons was her ongoing expectation that they could teach her something, even the newborns. She watched them closely, sometimes talking to them as if they were the Lord’s emissaries of wisdom.

“Tell me about God,” she’d say, focusing on the squinty eyes of a newborn who was still a year away from answering with words. But words or not, Mom expected to learn. And she absolutely loved the idea that our Savior was born a baby “in the usual way.” He didn’t arrive to save us dressed in the armor of a warrior. He didn’t inherit a throne through royalty. He didn’t conquer with guns or swords. Instead he entered the scene unremarkably… just by being born.

Mom used to tell us, “When you recite John 3:16, think about the word ‘begotten.’ God gave us his ‘only begotten Son.’ It means ‘born of parents,’ and Jesus was born just like you, helpless, dependent, needy.”

In the ordinariness of his infancy, she wanted us to learn something. She hoped we’d see that our Savior was approachable in his humanity rather than intimidating in his divinity. Years later we would learn the difference between him and us, of his sinlessness and our sin. But as children, she wanted us to relate to, and learn from, our common infancies.

Because Jesus willingly came in that humble way, we love him all the more.

“God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)