Wanting to Know?

Posted on November 30, 2014 by Margaret

Yesterday would have been Nate’s and my 45^th anniversary, had he lived. It wasn’t a sad day, because I spent time thinking of all the blessings of having been married to him. It was a long list!

Looking back at pictures of the two of us (here while we were dating), I smiled at the blush of new love. Since I met him two years before we decided to get engaged, I figured by that time I knew him pretty well. But when he died, after 40 years of marriage, I was still learning new things about him.

During those 4 decades I did learn that husbands and wives can never know everything about each other. Even after Nate found out he had cancer and would live only a short time, I discovered new things about him and his responses to life…. and death.

Something similar might be said about our relationship with Jesus. After we’ve first met him, whether as children or adults, we quickly begin thinking we know him pretty well. That is until we learn one more thing… and one more… and one more. Eventually, after decades of being Christians, we conclude there’s always more to discover.

Once in a while we find out something we’d rather not know, for example the high standard God wants us to live by or the humble attitude he wants us to have. We respond by trying to tweak what he said. We tell ourselves, “He didn’t really mean it that way. Surely it’d be ok if we did it just a little differently.”

Husbands and wives do the same thing with each other. After a few years of marriage when a wife learns something she doesn’t like about her husband, she tries to modify him or squeeze him into her definition of who she thinks he should be. He tries to do the same with her. (Nate and I were both guilty of this.)

The question to ask ourselves is, if I get to know who this person really is, will I still be able to love him?

That’s a good question to ask about Jesus, too. As we learn more and more, including things we don’t necessarily want to know, are we still willing to love him and cooperate with him?

A “yes” answer is the best answer, both in marriage and with the Lord, and it’s possible that even in eternity I’m going to learn new things about Nate. As for God, I have a hunch none of us will ever learn it all.

“What about you?” Jesus asked. “Who do you say I am?” (Luke 9:20)

Praising and Praying with Mary

I’m praising God for a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend with all the kids and grands, and 75 degrees!
Please pray for strength and energy for a busy week ahead.

Marking Time

Posted on July 8, 2013 by Margaret

When we were little kids, every birthday was a big deal. Older was always better, and when someone asked our age, we didn’t just say “six” or “eight.” It was “six and a half” or “almost nine.”

Numbers are important to children. I remember hearing a conversation between our Linnea and her friend Nancy when they were 5 and 6. The girls were in a discussion where one was trying to top the other. Nancy said, “I bet my dad is older than your dad. He’s 50!”

Linnea, wanting to throw out a number higher than that said, “Yeah, but my dad weighs more than yours!” Both were right, so each was satisfied. In the minds of children, bigger is always better.

We adults consider numbers to be important, too, though we’ve learned that bigger isn’t always better, as in high blood pressure, high risk investments, high taxes.

We like numbers because they’re a tangible way to check on our progress through life. How many miles per gallon is my car getting? How much will that plane ticket cost me? How many calories are in that dessert?

Some numbers, though, outweigh others: birth dates, death dates, marriage dates. Brooke and Klaus have been married 19 days now, and as the weeks pile into months and then years, 2013 will always be significant to them. They’ll forever see that number as momentous, the year when they officially, legally, willingly altered their status from individuality to togetherness, single to married. If they have children someday, 2013 will be an important groundwork year for their whole family.

This weekend a knock on our front door brought something unique to our newlyweds, a numbers-oriented wedding gift from good friends Justin and Krystal. They delivered a hand-made plaque made of sturdy wood and edged with rope, measuring 30” wide. It simply says, “Nyman, EST. 2013” and will be a constant reminder to Brooke and Klaus of their foundational year.*

This good-looking gift is exceptional in two ways: it was made by the hands of their friends, and it recognizes the value of long-term marriage. Dating a plaque with the year rather than month and day assumes the couple will be stockpiling lots of them.

In 2023 they’ll celebrate 10 years together. In 2038 they’ll have a party marking 25 years, and in 2063 it’ll be a 50-years-married blow-out. Maybe they’ll bring Buster and Krystal’s plaque with them to the party that day so as their guests walk in the door, it’ll be the first thing they see, a reminder that it all began waaaay back in 2013.

“They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord.” (Psalm 112:7)

* [The fish logo is a topic for another day.]

Loving commitment

Posted on December 6, 2012 by Margaret

Last night we enjoyed a simple supper of homemade turkey noodle soup and fresh bread at a table surrounded by both old and young engaging in animated conversation. Toward the end of the meal Klaus casually said, “Brooke and I went shopping for antiques today…. and we got engaged.”

He said it so matter-of-factly, we all froze, waiting for a punch line. But then we looked at the smiling Brooke, who slowly raised her left hand to reveal a sparkling diamond ring. Klaus wasn’t kidding!

Everyone broke into applause, jumping from their chairs and scrambling over each other to deliver congratulations and hugs. Grandchildren Nicholas, Evelyn, and Thomas were stunned at our crazy behavior, wondering how the focus so rapidly had shifted from dessert to a ring.

But we wanted the juicy details. Klaus had enlisted the help of several friends to pull off his surprise, “planting” them and his ring at an antique store ahead of time. Store employees were in on it too, willingly nestling the diamond ring among others inside a glass case. Brooke had been looking for a casual ring of turquoise, so the two of them were browsing through the jewelry. When Klaus nonchalantly pointed out the diamond ring and said, “How ‘bout that one?” Brooke was puzzled.

But when he dropped to one knee, her bewilderment changed to joy, and the clerks broke into tears. As planned, Klaus’ friends caught everything on film, a successful surprise with a lovely ending.

Or I should say “beginning.”

Anyone who’s experienced a proposal can vividly recall that moment. How a man handles this important event makes a mark on the relationship that will last throughout the marriage, not just in the woman’s mind, but in his, too.

By giving an engagement ring, a man is pledging to put that one woman above all others, which is the official beginning of an exclusive, lifelong bond marked by a special ring. He is promising her, and she is believing him. And since marriage was God’s idea, he’s involved in that moment, too, holding up a banner that reads, “Loving commitment.”

When a man proposes, he’s lovingly committing to his fiancee’, which greatly pleases the Lord. But yesterday God wasn’t just standing by passively at the antique store. He was making a commitment, too, to be as involved in their relationship as they ask him to be.

He has said that earthly marriage is a visual for the relationship between Jesus and the Church worldwide, which is us. So, as Klaus honors God by staying faithful to the loving commitment he made yesterday to Brooke, and as Brooke responds to him with respect, their marriage will thrive and God will be blessed. Bumps in the road will be made smooth, and they’ll make it to their 50^th wedding anniversary hand-in-hand.

As for the rest of us, we are thrilled to welcome vivacious Brooke into the Nyman family and are eagerly looking forward to celebrating with them at their spring wedding!