Most people want to know what’s in their future. Some pay fortune tellers to find out. Others read palms, tea leaves and crystal balls. But is it a good thing to know?
As Nate and I moved to Michigan in June, we had no idea what was coming in September, the month we got his cancer diagnosis. Even in September, we had no idea he’d be leaving for heaven by early November. Today, I have no knowledge of what’s going to happen tomorrow.
How would Nate and I have done things differently, had we known there would be only 42 days from his diagnosis to his death? Would we have rushed off to do some fun things before he was too infirm to want that? Would we have invited a string of friends to visit before he was unable to tolerate the stress of company? Would we have eaten more chocolate? Fixed lobster for dinner? Visited Europe? Maybe, but probably not.
What if Van’s Medical Supply had pulled their truck up to our door and unloaded all 21 pieces of hospital-type equipment at once? We would have had a major look into our future, and it wouldn’t have been good. I am thankful we didn’t know. Taking health steps downward one at a time was better than leaping down the whole staircase at once.
Another fact I was glad I didn’t know ahead of time was that I would have to keep track of 38 different bottles of medicine along with their dose amounts and times to give them. I’d have said, “If that’s my future, I can’t handle it.” But as the prescriptions increased, my ability to manage them increased, too, beyond my natural ability. God was one step ahead of me, equipping me to meet the need.
I didn’t worry about it beforehand, because I didn’t know it was coming. Now, with Nate gone and his medicines too, the old me, the ditz who can’t do numbers, is back. Balancing my checkbook is hard again, and I look back in wonder at how God prepared me for that numbers task that once was in my future and now is in my past.
How about my life as a widow? Would I want to know ahead of time exactly how that’s going to go? Only an idiot would say “yes” to that. I know there will be challenges greater than I’ve yet experienced in 64 years but don’t know what they’ll be. Not knowing, I don’t have to worry or fret.
The beautiful thing about God caring for me is that he’ll ready me for the tough stuff that’s coming before it gets here. I picture him walking ahead with a big machete, slashing away every obstacle in my path before I get there. I’ll be able to put one foot in front of the other without falling because of his provision for my future.
Some may desire to know what their “fates” will be. Not me. I’d rather claim “the full-circle verses,” the ones that describe how God is literally all around me and my future. After that, it’s easy to leave everything up to him:
“The Lord will go before you, and the God of Israel will be your rear guard.” (Isaiah 52:12)
“As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people, from this time forth and forever.” (Psalm 125:2)
“The Lord will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you may seek refuge.” (Psalm 91:4)
“The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” (Deuteronomy 31:8)
“You have enclosed me behind and before, and laid your hand upon me.” (Psalm 139:5)
Here are a few more:
Deuteronomy 33:27 “The eternal God is your dwelling place, and underneath are the everlasting arms.”
Isaiah 41:10 “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Exodus 23:20 “Behold, I send an angel before you to guard you on the way and to bring you to the place that I have prepared.”
Psalm 34:7 “The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them.”
I’ll bet there are lots of these! . . . like “God hugs”!
Love you lots, Margaret!
Thank you for the blessing of “the full circle” verses. I joked to Weez tonight to thank you for “nourishing my heart” by giving her the Ghiradelli’s brownie mix we enjoyed tonight, but reading this blog just now was nourishment much more fulfilling than brownies. Continuing to pray for you and your family.
This is real “surround sound”. And “high definition” as well. And it doesn’t come from BEST BUY. It’s absolutely free. Thanks, Marg for again pointing us to “wondrous things” in The Word. Blessings, MJ
I can tell you, He has incredible things for you ahead. I’ll be on the Chris Fabry show today on a topic burning in my soul. And I’m collecting sewing supplies for my 4th trip to Africa in January for widows. My dear Margaret, yes God is holding you closely and good things are ahead. Love you
Dearest Margaret,
It seems just yesterday that we met in Moms In Touch Prayer Group at CLA over 8 years ago! Who would have known how God would have used that friendship to bless each other?
You prayed me through taking over the 5th grade teacher role for Birgitta’s class, always showing up just at the right time with a sweet treat & encouraging Bible verse. That meant so much during those days as I sought God’s direction for every step.
Was it Linnea who came to speak to my class about her missions trip and shared the gospel so enthusiastically?
Then I was floored when you were Emily’s Small Group leader in BIC at AHEFC! Thank you for taking such an interest in her, always encouraging her (and Peter Jr.) with a smile.
It as so great to see you in Dominick’s this June, just before you were moving up to MI. I’ve been meaning to call/write you since then, but life gets so busy….
But your blog has been the biggest blessing of all. After our dear friend, Shirley Drazba, told me about Nate and your blog, I had a hard time finding it. This past Tuesday morning,I felt like I struck gold! I read every single entry from 5 to 7:40am, hiding under my covers with my iPhone, hoping my little ones would just sleep for a bit longer until I could finish. (My morning got off to a late start, but it was so worth it!)
I just had to write to thank you for giving me “the encouragement to keep moving forward” by His grace. If I had known my future back then – that we would have 6 six children, as well as other unexpected, earth-shattering challenges, I think I would have given up long ago. Thank you for letting God use you to minister to all of us through your tears & joy!
Lots of love & kisses,
Gina
Margaret, you continue to bless me with your blogs; I look forward to them and I KNOW – from experience…all the scriptures mentioned…are SO TRUE: out God is AWESOME !! there just is’t a human word better than that to even come close to describing Him…it’s all inclusive! AI totally agree about no knowing the future; one day at a time, and the adventure goes on…and what a comfort and joy it is..to KNOW..who Holds our future!! You are definitely NOT a Ditz; your’e a gifted, beautiful, intelligent, loving, knowledgable, fun-loving person, and so what if you have trouble balancing your checkbook…ask for help…it’s okay…we can’t be good at everything! If by chance we are…that’s ‘double blessing’….and you are truly blessed! Give yourself time to refrain from having to do anything that is not absolutely necessary…and take time to mourn your loss, regroup yourself and the Holy Spirit will lead you into a life of enjoyment like you’ve never known possible. Widowhood – is what you make it…you’ll see.
Blessings – I pray you have more than enough.
Margaret,
I want you to know I am praying for you. You and the kids are ever on my mind and I pray and think about you as you journey down this path that God has laid before you. Your blog is a blessing to me as well I am sure to all who read it. I wanted you to know – you are loved!
Love, Sandi
The seeds that were sown by your parents, Sunday School teachers, and others, have borne such wonderful, abundant fruit in your life – and you are sharing that with all of us. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I used to say to myself, “One day, when I grow up, I want to be like Aunt Pat.” Just substitute “Margaret” for your mom’s name, and you’ve got my latest prayer – and you are your mother’s daughter! Love to you.
It is only when we have walked through a horrible situation and look back, seeing the amazing, abounding grace with which God carried us through that we can look to the future with the hope and confidence that He will do so again. The old song “Because He Lives, I can face tomorrow…all fear is gone…because I know He holds the future and life is worth the living just because He lives (within and around us).
Thanks so much once again for your insight…God is so good to hold our hand through the journey of life, only showing us the next step, instead of the entire trip at once!
I like your distinction between trusting God for our future…or demanding to know one’s “fate.” Future is what hasn’t happened yet….”Fate” sounds like the sword of Damocles quivering above our heads! So with God hemming is in on all sides, and promising His presence at every step, we can…like the Israelites…march out boldly to meet the unknown. Your words continually point to the One who is giving you such hope, and in the process, draw the rest of us along for the ride. I’m very grateful to be in such company!
Margaret-
I just learned of Nate’s recent passing. I have been reading through your posts on this website and I have tears streaming down my face. It brings back memories of my own mom, Evonne’s illness and death and that of my husband’s father, Arnold Christiansen. He was also a member at AHEFC and Colin Smith performed his funeral. I don’t even know what to say but that we’ll be praying for you and your family. Your posts are inspiring and you have demonstrated such strength and faith. God’s blessings to you all!
Love,
Sara
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