Longing to Belong

When I was 3, my family moved from a close-knit Chicago neighborhood to “the country.” Today that “country” is just one of many Chicago area suburbs (Wilmette), but in 1948 it was still the wide open spaces.

Highcrest SchoolI wasn’t of school age yet, but my sister Mary was marched off to kindergarten at the small-ish country school a stone’s throw from our house. She was quiet and shy, not especially happy about being away from home, but Mom quickly became involved as the official Room Mother of her class, which helped. Mom was in and out of school on a regular basis (with me in tow), and I thought school was absolutely magical.

The kindergarten room fascinated me with its boxes of fat colored crayons, giant jars of sweet-smelling white paste, and wooden chairs that were just my size. Each student had use of a tiny square of carpet to sit on, and by secretly investigating the white chalk (crunch), I learned it was delicious.

Not ready for schoolWhen I pleaded with Mom to let me be a school-kid too, she always had the same frustrating answer. “When you’re ready.”

A year passed, and the next fall Mary went into 1st grade, but Mom still wouldn’t let me go. I thought I was more than ready, and since we lived just across a field from the school, it wasn’t long before I snuck over there on my own.

When I got to the kindergarten room, Mary’s former teacher recognized me and kindly asked if I wanted to sit on one of the carpet squares with the other children “before I went back home.” My dream had come true, though it was short-lived. In just a few minutes Mom was at the door.

All of us long to belong: to a classroom, a club, a family, a neighborhood, or any number of other groups. This longing is, I believe, put into us by God, since he values community and is an advocate of togetherness. So there’s nothing wrong with it.

At 3But longing to belong has its risks, too. It’s important to seek entrance into the right groups at the right time, letting God be the one to show us the which, the where, and especially the when. That includes everything from starting kindergarten to moving into a retirement home. It’s best if we wait till he has us ready.

There were many reasons why I couldn’t be a kindergartener at the age of 3, but eventually my time did come, and it happened just as Mom said: when I was ready.

Kindergarten(Front row, 4th from right)

Life will go much smoother if we wait for God’s readiness rather than push ahead of him on our own. It should always be his call, and in the mean time we should simply say, “I’m ready, Lord…. whenever you are.”

“Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.” (Matthew 6:33  The Message)

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