Hi, Mom: from Hans

We [son Hans and his family of 5, living in England] remembered Papa on Saturday evening, ordering in dinner, and chatting about that evening three years ago when he left us on earth and went home to Christ. For his arrival in Heaven we are grateful and are looking forward to seeing him again when our time comes, but in his absence from the earth, we miss him very much.

Like I said to you on the phone the other day, I long to be able to exchange thoughts and words with him more and more as I cope with walking by faith, working to support my family, and being the head of a household. I admire what he did as a father and the many sacrifices he made for us, and the care he displayed to us all.

I think of him in little things – like when we got little Fizzy, our precious feline, and the way he used to like putting hats on our cats and dressing them up! I think of him when we are getting everybody suited up for church each week, or when I come home from work in the evening and greet my little family.

I remarked to Kate the other day that the smell of Johnsons baby shampoo brought back strong memories of Papa for some reason. When I thought about it, I realized it was because he did our bath-time routine, just like I do with my kids, and I still connect the smell to him from that time.

I recall many memories of my father as I ‘go through’ these experiences on the other end, as the Dad. I recall how big his hands seemed when he signed something for us for school, and the loud laugh so completely his own, such a wonderful trademark of his. All my friends would always smile when they heard it for the first time, and every time after that. It was impossible not to join in when he started!

All my friends took a liking to Papa. He would take an interest in them and ask intelligent questions (sometimes too intelligent) and was non-judgmental, accepting even the rag-tag characters who stumbled through the door with us.

I found a note from Papa just last week, God’s timing:

It says, “Written on airplane, 4 – 13 – 09, Hans + Katy + Nicholas – Thanks so much for the airport run and the coffee and the baggage handling. It means a great deal to me. You have that blessed little treasure Nicholas. And bless you for dedicating him to Christ! You are doing life correctly! Our stay was absolutely wonderful! You and all the Mills are great hosts! Love, Papa/Nate.”

What a wonderful encouragement to read that from Papa these 3½ years later. The airport run, and coffee at Costa (Nelson, Papa, and me) as we awaited his departure flight, and baggage handling (because his back was troubling him).

This was the last time I saw Papa until he was close to the end of his life. He was classic Papa, and Nels and I sat with him at the coffee shop for a while, just chatting before his flight. I recall Nels remarked that it seemed a poignant time, because usually Papa was pushing the schedule forward, but on that occasion he was uncharacteristically laid back. When we kept suggesting it was maybe time to go, he’d say we had a little more time.

We love you and are thankful to have you,

Hans, Kate, Nick, Tom, and Evelyn

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“He who fathers a wise son will be glad in him.” (Proverbs 23:24)

12 thoughts on “Hi, Mom: from Hans

  1. to all of Nate’s family members- May the Lord abundantly bless each one of you with many, sweet memories of Nate, which becomes a comforting, healing salve, filling the void in your lives.

  2. Thanks so much for sharing this! I relate to it on many levels, especially in feeling closer to Papa while I’m with my kids. I have a much deeper appreciation for all he did for us now that I know how hard it is to be a parent sometimes! I’m so, so thankful for our family and miss you all every single day.

  3. Thank you, Hans, for taking us through your wonderful memories of your Papa, knowing he is rejoicing with Jesus and you will be with him for all eternity!

  4. I was thinking of all of you this past weekend as you were remembering Nate’s entrance into heaven. Thanks for sharing this today – I love hearing how the kids remember Nate and what an impact he had on their lives then and now. Praying for you as you continue to trust God with the future.

    Hugs from the other side of the state,
    Judy

  5. This was a precious read. Thanks Hans for the memories. Thanks Margaret for posting it.

  6. Margaret: you’ve raised a family of writers! Hans, thank you for sharing your heart. Those memories are so good.

  7. totally agree Claudia. It’s wonderful to hear our adult kids’ perspectives on poignant memories. Smiled over the baby shampoo aroma and delight in Nate’s infectious laugh.

  8. Thanks Hans and Margaret for sharing these precious memories of Nate. I only saw him a few times, but remember his smile, it was so contagious and genuine. May our Lord cover each one of you with His cloak of comforting love throughout these days of ‘remembrance and celebration of his life’.