Last night after I’d finished writing a blog about snakes, Birgitta and I talked about my snake-aversion. “Is it a phobia?” she said.
The dictionary defines “phobia” as persistent, irrational fear of something specific that leads to a compelling desire to avoid it. The answer is yes. But as we talked, Birgitta tried to dispel my fear by Googling a few facts.
She typed “Michigan snakes” into the search bar, forcing me to jump to a chair where I wouldn’t see the screen when pictures appeared.
Phobia for sure.
I know God is working on me, though, trying to rid me of it. Last spring Klaus found a dead snake (a blue racer) in our driveway, apparently run over by a car. As a joke he tucked it under Louisa’s windshield wiper. But wouldn’t you know, it was me who drove the car next, and of course it was drizzling. When the wiper blade shot up, the snake came with it, looking right at me and wiggling as if alive. I didn’t sleep for days.
Then last summer while walking Jack, I saw another run-over snake, this one brown and black. And last fall while riding bikes, we passed a yard-long garter snake traveling on the edge of our road. That’s 3 snakes in 3 seasons, a sure sign God is having his way with me.
Birgitta narrowed her Google search to SW Michigan and read aloud, hoping to prove my fear was irrational. But she kept coming up against facts she said I wouldn’t like, such as: many snakes have 30 to 50 young every year. My mind flashed a picture of snake-carpet covering our entire neighborhood, and my phobia strengthened.
Birgitta said, “When did your fear get started?”
We pinned it down to a 1951 family vacation in Florida. Mary (age 7) and I (age 5) had come across a poisonous coral snake in the yard behind our motel, and Dad’s reaction was uncharacteristic of him. “Stand back!” he yelled. “Get away!” as he attacked with a broom. That probably started my snakes-are-bad mentality.
Studying Genesis and “the serpent of old”* didn’t help, especially after I noticed that the snake was the only animal God ever cursed.**
Whatever the cause of my phobia, I know beyond doubt the Lord is offering to help. As I climbed the stairs to face another worrisome night, Google’s statement that snakes don’t do steps (since they can’t bend to 90 degrees) was reassuring. Then, surprisingly, as I crawled between the sheets, God gave me a tiny sliver of consideration for snakes: no hands, no feet, afraid of mankind, divinely cursed, and always eating dust. It’s not much of a life.
Maybe some distant day, we’ll even be friends.
This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: “Only in returning to me and resting in me will you be saved. In quietness and confidence is your strength.” (Isaiah 30:15)
*Revelation 12:9, 20:2 ** Genesis 3:14