Could things get any worse? Part II

None of us can say our lives have gone exactly as planned. We started with Plan A, but that evolved into Plan B or C. Some of us are on Plan Q.

 

Money troubles are not something we write into our plans, but most of us have experienced them anyway. According to statistics, financial stress is the number one cause of divorce, so we know tight funds are common among us. The question is, how do we handle them? How long does it take for us to bring God into the equation? And as we share our dilemmas with him, are we able to wait with patience when he doesn’t do anything?

 

When Nate and I were at our low point financially with seven children in the house, we were concentrating on praying hard over money issues and even fasting now and then to add power to those prayers. Right then things got much worse. We had a major flood from an upstairs toilet (yesterday’s blog) resulting in extensive damage. When we sought God’s explanation, he didn’t give one. (I’ve learned since then that God never has to explain himself. Just read the book of Job.)

One year after our flood, however, we were looking at two completely remodeled bathrooms with brand new ceramic tile floors (around the tubs, too). The walls and ceiling had been repaired, and the old fluorescent tubes had been replaced with recessed lighting. Homeowner’s insurance had paid for all of it at a time when refurbishing our well-used house would have been impossible.

 

A few years later, when we put the house on the market, the old, tired bathrooms had already been brought up to date without our having to pay for it. Although God wasn’t required to explain himself, these circumstances did it for him. And finally we understood.

 

God had, indeed, answered our prayers. It wasn’t as we’d expected, but isn’t that just like God? He’s unpredictable and virtually never responds to our requests by shaping circumstances as we’ve envisioned them. That’s because his ideas are always better than ours, and he knows what we need better than we do.

 

Looking back over the years, I’ve noticed a pattern. During periods of great need, when I’ve spent weeks praying with deep fervency, each situation got worse before it got better. It was as if God was in the process of stepping in to help at the same time that the devil was working hard to thwart him. Satan causes chaos, but God overrides that with order.

 

In other words, when we’ve asked God to rescue us and immediately thereafter life falls apart, we should get excited! The turmoil around us is a sure sign that God is about to do something brilliant!

 

“The Lord says, ‘Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!’ ” (Isaiah 43:18,19a)

Could things get any worse? Part I

Nate and I traveled through some lean financial times in our four decades of marriage. Any young couple starting out while one is a full time student has to wear a tight budget belt, probably buckled in the last hole. But newlyweds are pretty good at living on love. They believe their flush days are right around the corner.

 

When Nate got his first lawyering job at a downtown Chicago bank, we figured our salad days were over, and gravy was on its way. That proved true for a long while, but then the meat and potatoes began to diminish, and the gravy disappeared entirely. A government law change had collapsed Nate’s business, and what little money he was able to earn afterwards barely had a chance to register at the bank as it “flashed” through his checking account.

 

We stepped up our prayer efforts as the crisis continued, deciding it would be a good idea to add fasting, too. Neither of us knew exactly how God applied fasting to prayer requests, but we both knew it would somehow add extra power as we prayed. We called it “Fasting for Finances” which sounds catchy but is really hard to do.  On “date nights” we’d arrange for babysitting, then drive to a parking lot and spend the evening praying in our car.

 

During those days when I spent time praying by myself, I’d write out the prayers (as I still do). This became a written record of desperation. I knew I should claim Scripture as I prayed, so I chose James 4:2, “You have not, because you ask not.” I prayed it back to God and said, “Ok! So I’m asking! Would you please send money? We need money!”

 

Then one evening we arrived home to a big surprise. It was raining in the downstairs bathroom, and not through a window. The entire ceiling was a rain cloud releasing its load, and the floor was a pond. Plastic ceiling panels bowed beneath the water-weight of several gallons each, and one had already given way, splintering into many pieces as it hit the ceramic tile floor. Woodwork was buckling, and plaster walls were cauliflowering.

Upstairs the toilet had apparently been plugged and was also running, so it had overflowed for many hours. The cascade had soaked through two stories and even into the basement. After we turned off the water, we stood back and surveyed the damage to the upstairs floor, the downstairs ceiling and floor, the soaked plaster walls and the woodwork. Smack in the middle of the most severe financial stranglehold of our lives, we were facing massive new repair bills.

 
Before the water had even stopped dripping, I was lashing out at God. “How could you let this happen?! We did all that extra praying and fasting, and now this is how you answer? We asked for money, and you gave us bills!”

 

But he didn’t say a word.

 

(…to be continued)

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.” (Isaiah 43:2)

Come and eat!

Wise women have said the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I believe it.

When Nate and I got married, he came to me from a childhood of enjoying the creative cooking of his mother, Lois. She had a lavish cook book collection and used it often. As a newlywed, I realized I’d have to learn to cook if I was going to make my man happy.

Fortunately there was an effective buffer between Lois’ high-class dinners and my incompetence in the kitchen: university food.

Nate’s memory of those home-cooked meals dimmed as he ate in college dining halls from 1963 until we married in 1969, and his expectations were wonderfully low.

After 40 years of cooking thousands of meals for him, I remember only one word of criticism. I’d made a teriyaki stir fry, one of his favorites, but the sauce had turned out thin. Because it wouldn’t stick to the veggies or meat, I used a tip from Mom, adding a bit of corn starch to thicken the juices.

When Nate came to the table, he saw what we were having and said, “Mmmmm. Stir fry!”

We all sat down, heaped food on our plates and dug in. Nate had already eaten three forkfuls by the time I took my first. “My word!” I said. “What’s wrong with this stuff?”

That’s when Nate’s criticism came. “I kept trying, because I couldn’t believe it tasted so awful. What did you do to it?”

“I have no idea,” I said, walking my plate toward the disposal. That’s when I noticed the corn starch on the counter. Unfortunately, it was really baking soda. How I’d mixed up an orange box with a white can I’ll never know. But after we’d all enjoyed frozen pizza, we had a good laugh over my error.

Although I never became a skilled cook, I did learn one valuable principle preparing meals for a big family each day. More important than flavor, smell, ingredients or presentation was volume. Everyone was happier with a full stomach, and filling them up became my #1 priority.

Nutritionists might label that eating-suicide saying, “The food pyramid should be #1.” But my experience was that not having enough was worse than having only some of a perfectly balanced meal.

This principle works well with our spiritual eating, too. We can hold out for a gourmet meal: a peaceful place to read the Bible, a notebook to write in, a pen that works and a set of commentaries. We can wait to pray until we’re sure of uninterrupted time. But if we do, we’ll always be on the edge of spiritual starvation without enough to eat.

God is well aware of our fast-paced lives but creatively delivers spiritual nourishment as our appetites for him grow.

Scripture refers to its words as milk (for beginners) and meat (for the more advanced) and encourages us to taste it. So apparently the old adage does have some truth to it: the way to a person’s true heart is indeed through the stomach.

Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you.” (John 6:27)