Dad and Mom lived in four homes during 50 years of marriage: a newlywed bungalow, their bring-the-babies-home house, their larger place, and a downsized-ranch. Mom loved being a homemaker, and when Dad (13 years her senior) suggested a retirement community, she wouldn’t hear of it.
Later, when he died after only two weeks warning, Mom clung to their home like it was Dad himself. Being without him was heartbreaking, but it focused her attention on life after death like never before.
She told us about the night she was out watering her garden near midnight when she heard footsteps approaching. “Were you afraid?” I said.
“Actually I was hoping he had a gun and would do me in,” she said. “Then I’d get to be with your father.” She was only half joking.
Not long after that, Mom fell and broke her hip badly, requiring surgery. She had great confidence in the doctor, a family friend, but was secretly hoping the O.R. would be her launch pad to heaven. But the surgery went flawlessly, and Mary was there to tell her about it when she came out of the anesthetic.
Still groggy, Mom’s first word was, “Carl?”
“No,” Mary said. “It’s just me.”
Mom pulled the covers over her head and burst into tears, realizing she hadn’t ended up in heaven after all. Days later, well on the way to a full recovery she said, “I gave God a perfect chance to take me, and he passed it up.” (She lived 13 more years.)
Mom’s push toward heaven seemed extreme, but I admire two things about it: (1) her true love for Dad came through, and (2) her certainty of heaven was unshakeable. Day to day, hour to hour, a real heaven was on her mind, a specific place where her beloved had already gone.
Mom’s desire to be with Dad wasn’t her only heaven-themed longing. Her deepest craving was to run into the waiting arms of Jesus her Savior. She referenced that moment often and never doubted its authenticity. In 60 years as her daughter, I never heard a smidgen of uncertainty in her talk of one day living with Jesus.
Sometimes I find myself a little unsure. It isn’t exactly doubt, but it’s a serious wondering. How will it work when I move to the next world? The greeting we’ve heard some will get at heaven’s gate (well-done-good-and-faithful-servant) won’t apply to me. I love the Lord, but faithful servant? Not really. So, what are the other greeting possibilities? I wonder.
And what about the rush of guilt I’ll feel when I look into Jesus’ eyes? Or the regret that’ll sweep over me about my disobedience? What about my idle words? Time wasted? Bypassed opportunities? I wonder and wonder. How can it possibly go well?
But Mom? She never wondered. She was just plain sure, and that was delightfully refreshing.
“You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory.” (Psalm 73:24)
I loved your Mom. She was such a blessing and made us all laugh besides.
I loved Evelyn Johnson too….always twinkly eyes, always affirming…and she made the best roast pork!
I echo the words of Martye. Everyone loved your mom. I always smile whenever i think of her.
Your Momma, who was my Sunday School teacher and youth choir director, is STILL one of my mentors!
Amen to all of the above. Your mom was extra special.
Oh, Margaret, Jesus’s open arms have not a hint of disappointment or condemnation for HE is completing the good work HE has started in you. His unconditional love has NOTHING to do with your performance because HIS GRACE is SUFFICIENT.
The father of the prodigal son is the picture of our heavenly Father who STEPS out to greet us BEFORE we can even offer an “I’m sorry.”
Hebrews lists many of the “good guys” who by faith pleased God. Their shortcomings are blatant, they could not measure up…no one can. They were honored because of their faith, where did that faith come from…it was a GIFT from God…HE is the author and finisher (perfecter) of our faith. It seems that faith is something we recognize as God works through us, not something that we create within ourselves. It seems that God is pleased with HIS OWN work as He was (is, will be) pleased with His creation. Jesus was (is, will be) His good and faithful servant who has been creating and redeeming in coperation with the Father and the Holy Spirit since the foundations of the earth.
I like to consider Moses. As he greeted the trinity, in person, his wow factor is beyond my imagination as he began to recognize Christ and the Holy Spirit in all the unbelievably odd ways that he had encountered them on his journey. But that’s not my main point 🙂 ! Do you really think that God greeted Moses with disappointment, sadness, anger, or punishment on his mind? I don’t think so. I think God said something like, “MY work through YOU is finished! MY plan will continue through Joshua and countless others. I am not in the least discouraged by your performance, you have not surprised me at all. Your days on earth were numbered ages ago, I never intended for you to enter Canaan…look, I have a much better place for you now. Come, rest, and take dellight in ME.” Perhaps God even took him on a walk through time (He does transcend time) so that Moses could rest and delight in the BIG picture. WOW
Your transition, your entrance, into the presence of God cannot be anything but good because it is all about His grace, His plan, and His understanding,lean not upon your own.
I do not believe that the race set before us is a competition, the race track is not an Olympic one with separated lanes and a time clock picking winners and losers and officials awarding medals…gold for the first to cross the line, and the crowd ignoring the rest as no-bodies. Rather, our race is on a path with God providing the light unto our feet. I do not believe that God intends for us to compare ourselves to others, there is no one to beat or better in this race. Sometimes I wish that I could see the pillar of fire or the cloud that the Israelites followed on their race, but I know that He is allowing other manifeatations of His presence on my race. So, I refuse to believe that God has medals of varying value for each of us. When Jesus said that the first shall be last, I picture the next one being first, then that one becomes last, and on and on, so I picture a circle of equality. Was it Jams and John who wondered who would sit at Jesus’ right hand? Didn’t Jesus poo-poo that idea…that anyone needed to worry about being closer to HIm? He has enough gold medals, enough right hands, enough blue ribbons, enough A+’s enough “well-dones” for every one of us. In Christ Jesus there is no condemnation. The angels consistently brought God’s message…fear not. We will fall prostrate at Jesus feet because His glory is so overwheming, not because we feel guilty since Christ has already taken care of our guilt. Period!