Monthly Archives: August 2014

Just tell me!

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Once in a while Jack will walk up to me and quietly whine. If he’s been walked and fed, I’m not sure what he wants and wish he could just tell me in words, so I could help him.

Little children have a similar problem. They’re born with needs and opinions but can’t talk for a couple of long years. Parents are left to interpret the different nuances of their cries and behavior, hoping they’ll understand.

The first fiveBack when we had the first 5 of our 9 grandchildren visiting, all of them were sick at once. When they didn’t feel good, they’d whimper and cry, but 4 of the 5 (ages 1, 10 months, 7 months, and 7 months) didn’t have words to report what they were feeling. Sore throat? Clogged sinuses? Tummy ache? Headache? We could only guess.

During those weeks, there were several other reasons we wished our little ones had words: important items began disappearing. One day a baby monitor we’d used in the morning was nowhere to be found by afternoon. About the size of a cordless phone but white and with an antenna, it should have been easy to find.

Baby monitor setAll of us hunted with diligence, becoming increasingly frustrated not to find it. A day of searching went by and then two. We even prayed about it, not so much for the intense need of the monitor as to know where it went. “Lord, you see it right now. Won’t you show us?”

We asked our small fry, too, but of course they couldn’t tell us. After several days, we could only conclude it had gone into a local landfill by way of our trash.

Why didn’t God answer our prayer and show us the monitor? It would have been so easy for him. I find this exasperating yet symbolic of many unanswered prayers. We say, “Just tell me, Lord!” and he refuses.

Why? Maybe he wants us to:

  • practice waiting
  • increase in patience
  • learn to be more careful next time
  • learn to handle frustration
  • order our priorities
  • find humor in the situation

Apparently our family needed to learn those things, because we never found the monitor…

…until 3 months had passed.

Monitor in the middleWhile cleaning out the candle cabinet (a child-high, double-door cupboard), there it was. Little hands had hidden it in the back. Maybe we’d finally learned our lessons after all.

And interestingly, God didn’t use any words to answer our prayer.

“ ‘Can anyone [or anything] hide from me in a secret place? Am I not everywhere in all the heavens and earth?’ says the Lord.” (Jeremiah 23:24)

Praising and Praying with Mary

No chemo tomorrow, Labor Day, but please pray medical personnel will find a good vein on Tuesday for infusion #13.

What a Character

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Character CountsWe often see the slogan “Character Counts” on banners stretched across elementary school entrance doors and are taught from young ages that who we are when no one’s watching is the real us. Some people conduct their lives based on principles they refuse to compromise, but others live in the wiggle-room between conviction and chaos.

Most of us know that doing the right thing usually means making the hard choice, and that’s especially true when no one’s keeping track. But how many people actually do the right thing every time? Probably not many.

What if we define the specific lines we won’t cross no matter what, and then a test comes? How likely is it we’ll stick to our guns? How likely we’ll give in?

Satan lives by a set of principles, too. The trouble is, his are always at odds with ours, if we’re Christians. Everything that coaxes us to violate our own standards comes from him. But sometimes we can be our own worst enemy, unaware of crossing our own lines-in-the-sand until both feet are planted on the wrong side.

We tell ourselves, “A thought to do something bad is only a temptation, not a sin. I can’t help what pops into my head, and one thought leads to another. Until I’ve acted on it, it can’t be sin.” Is that the truth?

Scripture teaches us how to defend our principles by providing a model in Jesus. As we study his example, we see how to faithfully do what’s right. He lived a human life hounded by the devil just like we are, but he never crossed the line into sin. Satan often used the established Jewish big-wigs to harass him in unrelenting attempts to break down his resolve.

PhariseeOne day these officials approached him. “Teacher,” they said, “we know that you are a man of integrity and that you teach the way of God in accordance with the truth. You aren’t swayed by others, because you pay no attention to who they are.” (Matthew 22:16) Then they went on to try to trap him with words. But in this introductory statement we find two keys to living a principled life: (1) Base it on “the way of God in accordance with the truth,” and (2) don’t be swayed by the opinions of others.

As we work at these two things, we’ll learn to deny our natural me-firsts and substitute the ways of Christ. With enough practice, we’ll stop justifying our sins and find ourselves doing the right thing, even when no one’s watching.

“Whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” (Matthew 16:25)

Anointed with Oil

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Having little children in a house puts everyone on red-alert every minute. And when they can be heard playing just out of sight but then grow quiet, adults kick into high gear.

I remember when my two-year-old grandson Nicholas was visiting from England, happily chattering amongst the toys a short distance from three adults. It hadn’t dawned on us he’d grown quiet until I heard his mother’s voice: “Nicholas! No no no! You can’t have that!”

I raced toward the kitchen, rounding the cabinets in boots that slid across the floor as if it was a skating pond. We found Nicholas holding a spray can of cooking oil, pressing the button and christening the entire kitchen. Oil ran down his forearms and into his sleeves as he finished out the can.

Katy grabbed it, and Nicholas began rubbing his cheeks with his greasy hands. “Cream!” he said. None of us had told him the can was off limits, so he hadn’t done anything wrong.

NicholasShe grabbed Nicholas and headed for the bathtub while I dealt with the floor. Jack came around the corner and went sailing on the slippery surface, not once but twice, wondering why his legs no longer worked.

In the end, damages were insignificant, but this is a fitting example of why young mommies and daddies are often worn weary by their job. Parenting is open-ended and long-term with a finishing line that can’t be seen during the most difficult years.

God probably organized parenting in this way to give us a glimpse of our child-to-parent relationship with him. He’s “on our case” continually, just as we are on our children, and has no objections to the task being open-ended and long-term. As a matter of fact, he views that as beneficial, since most of us need all the time we can get to learn what needs to be learned.

Back in the 1970’s there was a movement in Christian circles: “Please be patient. God isn’t finished with me yet.” I had a button that said, PBP.GIFWMY, and a book came out with that same title. Although the fad passed, the concept is still true. God will never give up on us. When we fail, he doesn’t get frustrated but continues to encourage and nudge us forward.

Katy and Hans will never give up on teaching Nicholas, because they know his personal growth is a long-term project. Maturity doesn’t come in a day, and because they love him passionately, they’ll continue to clean up his messes and tell him “no” or “yes” thousands of times over the years.

But Nicholas is secure in their love, and when he had to surrender the can of spray oil, he did it knowing Katy’s disapproval didn’t mean she loved him less.

A child senses he is a work in progress, and as God parents us, we should sense it, too.

“Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:4)